Sarah Wells: Why your money language is just as valuable as your expression of love

No matter how old or young we are in our relationships, or whether the relationship is new or established, understanding each other is a key component to happiness.

According to those in the know, 80 per cent of our happiness or unhappiness is linked to those that we surround ourselves with, our sleep and our nutrition. Without these three key components, we’re not really living our best lives.

As someone whose profession, interests and curiosity is centred around people and money, I often wonder if we were as curious about our money languages as we are about our love languages, would we be happier?

If you’re not familiar with The Five Love Languages, it’s a book released in 1992 by counsellor Gary Chapman which outlines five general ways that romantic partners express and experience love. They include acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation and physical touch.

A money language is how we both receive or generate money in our lives, and how we equally use or pass it on. Similar to love, it also relates back to our mindset and values around money.

With money, I believe it’s about how you allocate priority to its use and value and the ease and urgency of how and when it arrives. Here are the four money languages:

Scarcity

You are fearful about money and live in a constant state of lack. This could be because growing up there was never enough.

Because of this, you save money for a rainy day and tend not to spend. You think very carefully before making big money decisions.

Debt scares you and you are judgemental of others who spend frivolously.

Abundance

Your intrinsic money beliefs embrace luck and skill. You always believe that you will have money when you need it, and spend accordingly.

This doesn’t mean you’re a wild spender. You have savings but you also trust that your skills make you money and the universe will provide.

You may have a small debt.

Responsible

You don’t take risks with money. You schedule direct debits like a pro and you believe that being financially safe comes directly from hard work and investment.

If you have debt, it’s a mortgage, and not a credit card.

Playful

You like to have fun with your money and you believe it comes to you and leaves you just as it should.

You are generous with friends and family, believe you have the Midas touch and take great pleasure from spending.

Your debts are lifestyle related and you don’t regret them for a second.